Let’s be honest. Hair envy is something we all experience during our hair journeys. When I first started my hair journey, the gorgeous heads of hair I found on hair blogs blew my mind. My own hair was very uneven (I was plagued with never-ending breakage) and unhealthy. I spent hours in hair forums, drooling over photos of long, healthy hair. I couldn’t help but become envious.
I spent the first six months of my hair journey doing two things. Obsessing over how long it would take to reach the Rapunzel-like lengths I saw and how long it would take for my hair to shine like gold. I pretty much drove myself crazy. I must have driven my boyfriend at the time a little nuts as well because one day (no doubt after pointing out the hair of another woman I admired) he told me “get over the envy. It’s okay to admire them, but it’s pointless to envy them. Learn their methods, join their ranks.” Five years later, I still remember his exact words because they helped shift my perspective in the right direction.
Now that I am transitioning to natural and embarking on a new journey, I’ve had to remind myself to enjoy the journey and love my hair just as it is… even on those wash days when I’m tempted to snip it all off out of frustration. Being envious of another’s beautiful curls or braid out is not the end of the world as long as I remember to shift that envy to admiration (while chanting “learn their methods, join their ranks”).
Here are four ways to shake off hair envy.
- Stop comparing your hair to others and embrace the fact that we all have to start somewhere. We’re all different. That’s part of what makes us beautiful. Embrace your difference in texture, curls, and length because it makes you, YOU.
- Learn as much as you can. Healthy hair isn’t achieved without some knowledge of how your hair works. You definitely won’t have healthy hair if you don’t understand why it needs moisture or protein, or even what ingredients to look for when hunting for staple products. Educate yourself on proper hair care techniques in order to achieve the hair you want.
- Be patient. With time, proper healthy hair techniques, and tons of patience, the health of your hair will improve and the length will follow.
- Try new styles. Rocking the same look may get pretty boring. Try a new style from time to time to help bring you out of your comfort zone or even to reassure you that you can rock your own beautiful curls inspired by your hair crush. Flexi rods, bantu knots, or perm rods are a great way to achieve heat free curls overnight.
How do you deal with hair envy?
Written by guest contributor Jen from Just Grow Already